I'm struggling with my imagination today. Writer's block? Perhaps this is my first official taste. I've spent months putting off the task of sitting down and bleeding out everything I've wanted to express, but when I feel the need to I find my mind is like a puzzle box.
When I first looked at the black and white photo above I imagined a place where I'd love to spend the rest of my life. Surrounded by nature, solitude in abundance; this is a place where I could see myself writing and raising my child. I could see myself sitting under that tree, with a good read for inspiration, sipping fresh lemonade after a day of playing in the garden with Zeke. I can see myself soaking up the sun or laying inside on the floor watching the rain splatter the windowpane.
My imaginary world is much more beautiful than my reality. In a world where I'm supposed to never make a mistake, where I have to be a certain size and weigh a certain amount to be considered pretty, where I have to have specific things in order to be happy, buy top labels, eat organic everything - the pressure is overwhelming. When I look at this photo, I see a place where none of that matters. Where I can exist happily without any negative judgment. Where the superficial and distorted societal views have no power over me.
When I'm feeling so small in a world that I have no control over, I can just close my eyes and I'm instantly in my happy place. Don't get me wrong, my husband and my baby both fill my world with so much love and joy, but there are days where there are clouds hanging over me that not even they can chase away.
On days like today, when my mind is taking me in a hundred different directions, there is always one place where I can return to put myself back together. And looking at this photo just added a new dimension to that world. Kendra Land is a pretty fantastic place. And I starting to believe that I'm quite fantastic myself.
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